Synagogue Bulletin Bloopers

These announcements were found in shul newsletters and bulletins.

1. Don't let worry kill you. Let your synagogue help. Join us for our Oneg after services. Prayer and medication to follow.

2. We are pleased to announce the birth of David Weiss, the sin of Rabbi and Mrs Abe Weiss.

3. Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the JCC. Please use the large double door at the side entrance.

4. The Rabbi is on vacation. Massages can be given to his secretary.

5. We are taking up a collection to defray the cost of the new carpet in the sanctuary. All those wishing to do something on the carpet will
come forward and get a piece of paper.

6. If you enjoy sinning, the choir is looking for you.

7. The Associate Rabbi unveiled the synagogue's new fundraising
campaign slogan... "I Upped My Pledge. Up Yours."