Cheap

The newspaper obituary operator received a phone call. The woman on the other end asked, "How much do funeral notices cost?"

"Five dollars per word, ma'am," came the response.

"Good, do you have a paper and pencil handy?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Okay, write this: 'Cohen died.' "

"I'm sorry, ma'am, I forgot to tell you there's a five-word minimum."

"Hmmph," came the reply. "You certainly did forget to tell me that." After a moment of silence, the woman continued, "Got your pencil and paper?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Okay, print this: 'Cohen died. Cadillac for sale.' "